Decorating has never been a big priority for me. My own
mother decorated her home with cobwebs, ninja weapons, dirty dishes, and cats,
so I feel like a vintage tin sign advertising fishing tackle is a step in the
right direction, even though I don’t fish.
I guess you could say I don’t get emotionally invested in
material things. When you put it that way, it sounds very Zen. I promise you, I
am not enlightened. I was feeling anxious yesterday so I scarfed down an entire
bag of gummy bears and also some other stuff. I sob inconsolably when I have
too much to drink, and also sometimes when I haven’t. I have a habit of dating
people who don’t have jobs. I have been known to get snappy when I am feeling
irritable. These are not the actions of an enlightened person.
But in the swiftly receding days of my wildly misspent
youth, I lived out of a Dodge Neon for six months. That Dodge Neon was better
decorated than my house is right now, but only because my artist boyfriend drew
on the headliner with a Sharpie. I have also lived out of backpacks, tents,
vans and RVs (not all of which ran, I feel compelled to add), squat houses, and
for one memorable two-week period, a cave. A CAVE, YOU GUYS. It was in
Wisconsin. I don’t exactly regret it – all things considered, I have
surprisingly few regrets – but if you’re going to live in a cave, take my
advice and don’t do it in Wisconsin, in October.
All of which is to say that if there is one thing I’ve
learned in my many travels, it’s that there are more important things than
having nice furniture.
Like having furniture, for a start.
