Saturday, April 27, 2013

X is for Xenophobia

Xenophobia is the fear of foreigners, or that which is considered to be foreign, which is a serious problem in this country. For example, when some people find out that I lived in France, they offer me their condolences. Some of them might be joking; it’s kinda hard to tell because I have such a sh&tty sense of humor.

There is no reason to be afraid of foreigners, and I don’t understand it. I’ve met lots and they don’t bite...much. I can’t fathom why you’d be anything other than curious upon meeting someone from another country, or someone who’s been to another country. Then again, if you go around talking to people from other countries, you might find out they have things you don’t, like health care. Of course there are plenty of countries worse off than we are, because we bombed them. Funnily enough, you never seem to meet anyone from those countries.

As an American abroad, I’ve encountered plenty of people who don’t like me the minute they hear my accent. Maybe the fact that I sometimes slap people also has something to do with it. I don’t think that’s fair – not liking me because I’m American, I mean. You’re allowed to not like me if I’ve slapped you. In fact, I expect it. Nothing’s worse than slapping a dude and finding out he liked it. Unless that was your plan all along, of course.

But I digress.

I don’t go around not liking people just because they’re British, and believe me, I’ve considered it. So I don’t think it’s fair that people should go around not liking me just because I’m American. I know a lot of things, I’m funny, I make a mean roast chicken, I speak French, and I’m a perfectly nice person most of the time. I’m even told I’m great fun when I’m drunk.

Remember, kids, don’t be afraid of people who are different from you, because no one is really that different from you! It’s a learning experience! Learning is fun!

Hooray!